#9 Part Two, Why I joined the Navy

I was overjoyed! I’d just found out that Judy was pregnant and was so happy!

She was mad, disgusted and didn’t want the baby. She was wanting to get rid of it. I was shocked and wouldn’t have any part of this.

I told my parents and they decided that we needed to go to El Paso to see her in person. I agreed so we went down that same weekend.

To say she was happy to see me wasn’t the case. Like I said she was angry, VERY angry. I couldn’t blame her but it was both of our faults. We were careless and now we had a decision to make. We could move on with our lives or end a life.

She said she hated me. She said ugly things. I took it all. I was crying she was crying. I was naive to the fact of why she didn’t want to have this child. Why she didn’t want to be with me.

Seeing it now it was because we we young. We’d only been going out for six months and in that it was a long distance relationship from the very start. I should have known it wasn’t going to work out and left it at that.

But now that wasn’t an option since a life was on the line. I told her what I wanted to do with my life and told her I was joining the Navy. There I could provide for the baby and her IF she wanted to get married. More ugly things were said by her and again I took it all. I again told her we could be married have a life and provide a stable environment for our new family if she wanted that OR I would go on my way and provide for just the baby.

So she decided and we did get married. I joined the Navy. I went to San Diego for Boot on May 10th, 1987. On June 28th Veronica Diane Tessler was born!! I was so happy! I graduated a week later and reported to Damage Control A school and graduated second in my class. I attacked my school work for my family. I was going to prove to Judy that I was dedicated to our new family and that I would be a good father.

Even though my marriage to Judy didn’t work out it happened for a reason. She couldn’t handle the military and I have now accepted that. She wasn’t met to be away from her family. God had other plans.

I have two wonderful daughters and would never give up the years I had. I wouldn’t change a thing. I learned a lot from being married and have many many life lessons from that first marriage.

All I can say is BE SMART!! I was not. We were not. We were kids and didn’t see that. God has a way of showing and forcing people to grow up. That is what God showed me in my first marriage.

How has God forced you to grow up?SteveVeronicaSteph1996


11 thoughts on “#9 Part Two, Why I joined the Navy

  1. Steven, although this is such a messy story, it’s cool to see a dad fight for his child. It’s usually the other way around. The respect I have for you has jumped ten notches. For me it took three years in prison to wake me up.

    • There’s even more but I’m hesitant to write it. You my friend are amazing! I can’t imagine what you went through but I to have so much respect for you and what you’ve accomplished and are going to accomplish!

  2. Amazing story told with great honesty. Facing death at 29 with a stage 4 cancer diagnosis, was a pretty grown up moment. Still learning and growing everyday by the grace of God!

  3. Being divorced, I really appreciate your perspective on your first marriage and second your advice. Your daughters are beautiful, I’m so thrilled that you have them and that they have you.

    • Thanks for your comments! I’m not sorry for the decision I made. It does still hurt because I’ve only seen my daughters a handful of times since the divorce. I just talked with my oldest last night and it was awesome to hear her voice. I’ve not spoken to her in over a year.

  4. What an interesting post. You are right in that God does give us things that force us to grow up. I think it makes us stronger and builds our character in the end.

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